With the divorce rate hovering around 50%, it’s safe to assume that there are some destructive relationship dynamics going on in many relationships. I think we all can vouch for the reality that relationships can be harder and trickier than we once thought. There are plenty of people who are actually stuck in a destructive relationship and for one reason or another cannot break free from it. They either don’t realize that they’re in it or do realize it, but feel stuck or unable to break free.
Destructive relationships have certain characteristics that keep a couple is bondage and can cause a great deal of pain.
- Lack of communication skills
- Lack of coping skills
You might be in a destructive relationship if you and your partner argue much of the time, if there is a lot of jealousy going on, if you are continually angry with your partner, or you feel suffocated and trapped. Every relationship will have its occasional difficulty, but if those difficulties occur almost all the time, it may be time to evaluate your relationship.
Gauge Your Relationship
Take some time to gauge your relationship dynamics.
Is jealousy rampant? Are you unable to resolve conflict in a healthy manner? Are you miserable? Are you afraid to leave your partner? Have you put up with abuse of some sort? A relationship evaluation every once in awhile is a good idea. As you reflect on things, have a conversation with your partner about how your relationship is going. Discuss things that you two are having problems with and come up with a solution. Work at compromise and negotiation.
Relationships Take Time and Energy
They are not as easy as many people think. If you’re really struggling, consider seeing a professional counselor to work out the kinks. If you invest in your relationship and learn about creating solid and healthy dynamics, the chances of it working out increase greatly.
If you’re in a destructive relationship and you and your partner are not willing to get help and work it out, consider ending the relationship. This might be difficult, but if neither of you is happy in the relationship, it might be the best solution. Perhaps you are not compatible or ready for a relationship. Either way, take some effort at resolve, as your goal ought to be a healthy and loving relationship.